Farewell 2017: New Year, New Me

 I can’t believe 2017 is over! 2017 has been an emotional roller coaster ride. There were many ups and downs. I couldn’t tell you guys how many times I tried to figure out what I want to do with my life and who I want to be. I felt emotionally exhausted from soul-searching. There were lessons learned. I know I do not want to repeat the similar mistakes again. I noticed some friendships grew and some friendship faded. I decided to cut some people off out of my life who I felt were not important to me or relevant.  They showed me their true colors when I needed them. I’ve acknowledge some people were not meant to be in my life forever, however I appreciated every person who came into my life. Every person has brought me a life lesson. 2017 was also about making big decisions. I have figured out what’s important me and learned how vital my future can be for me. I finally know what I want! I will fight for what I want!

I was able find peace with myself after being depressed for about two years. There were a few moments in my life where I had suicidal thoughts. It was scary to admit, however it’s a great thing I never harm myself in anyway. I was able to pull away from my miserable self. I thought I lost myself,  but I never did. I’ve fought through all the drastic changes in my life, which helped shaped me to become the person who I am destine to be.  I was terrified about how my life will never be same again. I know I can be my own worse enemy, which I’ve acknowledge one of my biggest weakness is being a perfectionist. I’m aware that I am human and my life will never be perfect. No matter how much I want it to be!  I can always try my best in whatever I set my mind into. The year of 2018, I’ll continue to enjoy living my life to the fullest. I can do whatever I want since I don’t have a family or children.

In 2017, I’ve grown to be comfortable of being alone. Sometime I don’t need to have company to have fun. I love spending personal time with me, myself and I. Sometime I rather be at home and binged watch on Netflix in my bed whenever I could. I’ve also learn how important self love can impact on my life. In order for me to find internal love and happiness, I have to start taking care of myself first. I am proud for overcoming my struggles. I can see I have became an mature adult. I’ve transformed into a beautiful flower. I am no longer shy or insecure about myself.  I am strong, confident, and beautiful. I know what I want!


2018 will be the year for me. I can feel it! I can’t wait for what the year will bring me! I will never stop learning and improving myself on a daily basis. I will continue finding new ways to appreciate and love myself. I’m looking forward for new opportunities heading toward my direction. I will not give up on what I have. And I will not give up on myself! I will fight, fight, fight!


My New Year Resolutions:

  1. Take better care of myself: both physically and mentally
  2. Focus on what is important to me
  3. Appreciate the little things in my life
  4. Do more, take more initiatives
  5. Connect and network with new bloggers, influencers & artists
  6. Focus on building my brand by working on more collaborations.
  7. Get out of my shell: Don’t be afraid of feeling uncomfortable
  8. Find more ways to make more money
  9. Travel more, try out new things
  10. Have fun and enjoy my life

 My friend Jacob and I decided to do a fun collaboration a few months ago. We put together a beautiful Fall photoshoot. Jacob did an awesome job creating the short video clip from the photoshoot. The video is posted below. Jacob is very talented at what he does. He is a great photographer and videopgrapher. I always enjoy working with Jacob. All of the pictures came out beautiful. He was able to captured a different side of me, which I never noticed before. It is an incredible feeling to feel care-free and happy again. It is refreshing for me to feel this way!  It is pretty awesome how Jacob was able to capture the feelings I’ve had that day.


This video represent maturity, self love and moving forward with my life. I hope you all can relate to my stories in some ways. I hope you guys enjoy watching this short clip.

Check out Jacob’s website to see more of his awesome collaborations:

https://jacobalexander35.myportfolio.com/

Follow him on Instagram as well!!

@ja_did_it  

&

@forward.films_

My Inner Circle

I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and focusing on what is important to me. I also noticed that my relationships with my friends has changed. Of course I have different groups of friends. I noticed either some of us had grown apart or maybe we don’t share the same level of interests or hobbies anymore. I am also surprised some of my closest relationships that I had since my childhood also faded away. I know some of you guys may think I have a lot of friends in my life, but to be frank I don’t. I have to admit it hurts sometimes….. I tend to be get emotional when I loose a friend.

It is hard for me to maintain my female friendships, especially in my 20s. This is the time of my life where I want to share my experiences, my success, my journeys with my friends. Trust is also very important to me and I find it challenging for me to trust anyone around me. Sometimes I feel lonely. I like to be invited to social gatherings and special occasions even if I don’t show up or I couldn’t attend at least someone was thinking about me. I hate being left out from a social gathering or from a group. And It’s not a great feeling either.

I don’t know if any of you ladies can relate to me, but let me ask you all this. How important does friendships means to you? Let me be specific, how important is your female friendships? Ask yourself these questions….Who do you think are your true friends? Are your so-call “friends ” reliable? Do you have a friend that you can trust to keep your darkest secrets? Who do consider is your best friend? When was the last time you asked yourself, why did some of my friendships fizzled or dissolved away?

It is frustrating to me. Sometimes I never had a clear explanation why things ended a certain way. I do understand we all are busy with our separate lives. Majority of us have full-time jobs and have other responsibilities to prioritize. Some of us have boyfriends and girlfriends that we want to focus on, but it also important to focus on your friends to make sure we continue to stay connected whenever we need each other or want to see each other.

I tend to ask myself, did I do something wrong? or Did I say something wrong to make them not want talk to me? I have to put on a fake face pretend everything is okay, which I really hate! The last thing I don’t like being called is being two face. I’m not trying to point any fingers or targeting anyone. I understand certain friendships aren’t meant to last forever. I learned over the last few years, a few of my friends changed. They finally showed me their true colors of themselves. Some of those changes I didn’t like or understand which results our friendships to fade away. I’ve already tried to do my part to mend my relationships and even tried to stay connected. I’m getting frustrated of being the only person reaching out. Come on! It’s not a one way street here! I’m over everything honestly…

In a week I will be turning 26 and I decided to turn a new leaf in my life. I decided to let go all of the negativity I’ve experienced with with myself in the last year. I’m going to cherish and appreciate all of the friendships I’ve developed whether my friends are from work, from school or etc… and also I will pay attention to the people who are in here for me and want to be around me. I believe there is a reason for every person who walked into my life and each person carried a learning lesson. What I need right now is to surround myself with positive and encouraging people that will push me to reach my goals and dreams. I’m not forcing anyone to be my friend, if anyone feel they are being forced to be my friend then you all can leave because I don’t have room for any negativity nor dramas in my life! The last thing I want to do is set expectations on friends, and if they don’t meet those expectations then I will get disappointed. I don’t need anymore stress in my life to worry about. I’m done. Whatever is done! I don’t anyone to waste my time or energy!!!

My “Quarter Life Crisis” Story

This year I am 25 within five years I will be 30, which is pretty scary to think about! I don’t know if anyone experienced or dealt with “quarter life crisis”in their life, it really sucks! Let me break this down for you… what is “quarter life crisis”???…

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According to a recent study about emerging adults and young adults “somewhere between mid twenties and thirties, they might be experiencing a serious low point in their life. It could be a trial of confused identity, misguided purpose, awkward and hopeless transition.” And, if you’re anything like me, you feel lost, anxious, and panicked.


7 reasons why I might be experiencing  “quarter life crisis” right now…

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1.) This is a confusing time for me. I hate the feeling being stuck in one place and not moving forward to another. And that’s not normal to me! I feel very lost….

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2.) I don’t know what I want to do with my life. Some of my friends who are fresh out of college are fortunate to land their perfect job with full benefits and a solid career plans. For me, I haven’t find mine yet!!! I am concern I won’t succeed before I’m 30. I don’t like to compare myself to other people, but sometimes It’s difficult not to compare myself…I do understand competition is a part of nature and I can never avoid it..

3.) Most of My friends around me are either getting engaged, married or having a baby. For me, I am not engaged or getting married anytime soon. I am no where ready for marriage. Even though I do have my fairy tale dream wedding (sigggghhh)…. I am tired of people asking me when am I ever getting marry… Sometimes I wish everyone can back off and relax! Only time will come…

4.) Yes, I have a loving boyfriend who can always cheer me up….And don’t get me wrong  I love him and adore him, but sometimes it’s not enough. I need to have spent quality time with my girl friends.  I want to be able to share my feelings and experiences because only my “girl” friends can understand what I’m going through. Sometimes men don’t understand us “women” go through on a regular basis.  It’s hard to relate.

I find it difficult to make friends as an adult, especially with females!!!!. We are so catty!!! My circle of friends is getting smaller and smaller by the minute. It’s hard find friends trustworthy and loyal who I can depend on. Most of my friends have boyfriends and have their own priorities, sometime  I am afraid distance and time will drive friendships away without any explanations or reasons. Or Perhaps maybe my personality have change or we don’t share the same level of interests anymore …. Whatever Who knows ..

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5.) Do I want to stay in Connecticut for the rest of my life?! I have no idea! I have been living in Connecticut since I was 5 years old… I don’t know where I will be living in the next 5 years..  I would love to move to a different state. I don’t mind moving to Texas… Or I always want to live in New York or Boston, but I never got the nerve or courage to make it happen. Shoot… I’m 25 years old and I’m still living with my parents (sighhhh). Plus I’m not financially stable yet…

6.) I hate the facts as I get older, I get hit with more responsibility and with more responsibility usually leads to more bills…… so looks like I will be broke for life.

7.) Sometimes I have moments where I feel like I don’t give a fuck anymore. As in I want to give up or run away from reality. I’ve experienced my high moments and low moments. There were some moments where I felt anxious or angry at the strangest time… I felt like I’m going to blow up because I have a lot of things bottled up inside and all I want is to scream on the top of my lungs!  Or I dealt having random panick attacks  ( Don’t  worry I’m not depressed). I’m okay.

Sometime I have moments where I like to go with the flow, going on spontaneous things without having any thoughts and negative repercussions … I called this “yoloing”, which means I don’t care what other people think. And just “do  me” and keep moving forward.


The reason why I am writing this post about my experience with “quarter life crisis” is to share my story and also bring awareness about this social issue. I’m not trying to draw attention to myself.  Many millennial from the age 25 to 35  had either dealt with  “quarter life crisis” or currently experiencing it right now.  It is  common to feel confused or lost.

Hopefully this social struggle is only temporary. I will eventually find my strengths and push through my problems.

And please don’t you worry, you are not alone…. you shouldn’t feel lonely.

   Xoxo #phashiontherapy

Motivation Monday 


I know the weekend flew by wayyyy to fast. And it’s time we all have to get back to our reality. But don’t forget this weekend is 4th of July weekend! So I do know majority of us will have a long four days weekend!!!

Here is a little encouragement and love from me to help cure the Monday blues that we are all having.  I hope you have a bless  and beautiful day. We all should appreciate for living another brand new day. Breathing in the fresh air that we’re all breathing. Having the opportunity to look around to our surroundings; gazing at the horizon, the flowers and birds in the sky, the clear blue sky and the people around us. We will never know with endless of opportunities that can happen to us in one day….All we need is to have hope! Remember we all can do whatever we want to do if we put our mind into. Don’t let negativity hinders us from reaching our goals and achievements. Including small goals too!  We do not need any negativity in our lives! And remember to push through and say

I CAN and I Will“!!!

Xoxo 😘 #phashiontherapy

Keep Moving Forward

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The “keep moving forward” quote by Walt Disney is one of my favorite quote of all time. This quote is my life motto. I even have a tattoo of an arrow, which is inspired by this quote. I know it’s kind of corny, since this quote is an inspiration behind one of Disney’s animated movie, ” Meet the Robinsons”…. Which is also one of my favorite animated movie. I love the meanings behind this message.

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Why this “keep moving forward” quote reflects my life:

I can relate myself with this message. I’m always an optimistic person. I try my best to remain positive, even if there’s some real dark days where I just feel like my story is falling apart in everything I do. However I eventually I find a way to overcome my situation whether it’s an obstacle, an problem, a disagreement, or a mistake.  I usually take every experience as a learning lesson, even horrible experiences and continue to move forward without  looking back to my past. 

 I’m always curious. I am open to new adventures. I am always been a big dreamer with ambitious goals. I am never afraid to jump into new opportunity without a doubt. By taking risks, I would never know where my adventure could lead me.


I  am never shy meeting new people. When I see a stranger, I would greet them with a smile on my face: I’m open to forming new relationships with people I met. I learned to accept sometime friendships doesn’t always last. Sometime certain people aren’t meant to be in my life forever.

 Life is be too short to hold on to any negative memories. It’s not worth to hold on to grudges and sometime I have to let things go in order for me to move forward. I try my best to appreciate what I have, rather than wishing for what I “should” have because I can’t always get whatever I want in life.

 

##phashiontherapy

 

 

 

My Spontaneous Shopping Spree!!

First of all Happy New Year everyone! Hope you all enjoyed your holiday break and holiday festivities. I know I haven’t wrote a new post in a while. I have been busy with work, but also spending a lot of time with my family and friends over the holiday break….I hope you guy enjoy reading this new post!

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hm(photo: H&M’s website)My shopping spree at H&M

Last Friday I was shopping at one of my favorite clothing stores, H&M. The first thing that I noticed when I entered to the store was the “Up to 60% off selected styles” display sign in the front of the store.  Of course I have  to check out the sales! I immediately ran to the sale section of the store and rated every section. I looked through carefully at each section and found a few items of clothing that I was obsessed with and had to buy them!

imageThe first thing I found on the rack was this sexy-looking leopard, yellow-mustard colored skater dress, in my size! The dress was marked $15, plus an extra 30% off of the sale price.  The dress cost only $10!! The dress looked perfect on me and fit every part of my body! The dress made me feel sexy and classy at the same time!

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The second thing I found on the rack was this off-white knitted sweater. When I tried on this sweater, it felt so warm and comfy. It was marked $15, plus an additional 30% off of the sale price! The sweater cost $10!!

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I brought three infiniti scarfs!  Burgundy, black, and off-white scarfs were on sale for $2.50!! Each item was marked $5, plus an additional 50% off of the sale price.

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I got the silver/grey sweater for only $5! The sweater was marked $7, plus additional 30% off! The style looked great on me! I felt comfortable and confident!

I’m obsessed with everything that I brought from H &M!! Normally if these clothes were regular prices, I would’ve walked out of the store paying over $100!  I only paid $38 for all of these items!

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(photo: H&M’s Website)

There is still time!The sale special doesn’t end until today!  Deals Up to 60% off selected styles only, online or in-store purchase. Deals starting from $5…..

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My Shopping spree to PacSun

I went to PacSun to look for boyfriend jeans and some new crop tops. When I got to the store I found a couple of pairs of boyfriend jeans and they were on sale for $19.99!! They were destroyed boyfriend jeans. The jeans fit perfect on me!  Normally it is difficult for me to find boyfriend jeans in my size because I have a petite body frame. I was so happy to find a pair that fit!

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($19.99 Bullhead destroyed boyfriend jeans)

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The cropped-tees were buy 1 & get 1 free! Each were marked $16! I’ve been dying to buy casual cropped-tees. I wanted to find tees to paired up with my new boyfriend jeans! One in mint-green & the other in tribal-printed style.

Hello Autumn!!!

hello-autumn-quotes-2I have to say one of the most beautiful part living in The New England region of the United States is adapting and experiencing the four seasons of the year. The Four Seasons –Winter, Spring, Summer, Autumn— are periods of the year marked specific weather conditions, temperatures, different characteristics and length of days. I have to say living in Connecticut for 17 years, Autumn is my favorite season! what a beautiful season it is!!


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8 Reasons why I Love Fall:

1.) I love the changing color of the leaves and falling leaves. It is one of the most beautiful part! I learned that the reasons why the leaves change color  because of changes in the length of daylight and changes in temperature.

2.) The smell of delicious apple spice and pumpkin spice theme is everywhere I go and is very addicting! From coffee, donuts, bakery, pastries, festivals, non-alcoholic & alcoholic beverages, food and etc..

3.)  The Temperature feels just right! I love the crisp air! I like the feeling of cold breeze rubbing against my face and nose. Also I can behind to see my breathe, breathing in the air!

4.) Best season to drink Hot coco or herbal tea and ginger snaps around my fireplace!

5.) Fashion Week during  Fall & Fall trends and styles seem more inspiring, intriguing, glamorous, edgy and daring!

6.) I love wearing cozy sweaters & layering clothing! Perfect seasons to wear flannels and oversize jackets & coats! Best season to accessorize myself from leggings and leg warmers, scarves, hats,  different style of tights( from colors, designs, & materials)! Best season for footwear from booties, combat boots and knee-length boots, boots with heels, and chunky heels shoes! Warm colors/ monochromatic colors are everywhere!)

7.) Thanksgiving is my favorite Holiday! Spending time with my family and love ones. I love family gathering and big family feast! I love eating turkey, mashed potatoes with gravy, stuffing, and cranberry sauce! Being Thankful for what I have and more!

8.) lastly, Also the best part is MY BIRTHDAY is during fall!! Yes, November 27th!!! TEE HEE!!


Reminder: (My fashion blog is my sanctuary. This is a place where I go to express my creativity and be myself. I like writing things that are inspiring me. I know I’m not an expert, but everything I write is based from my own thoughts,beliefs, ideas and opinions. Thank you! )

Thank you for viewing my blog! I really appreciate it! xoxo